Be Kind
My blogs so far have been on the silly side of teaching and
leadership...lamenting the woes of what a teacher leader is supposed to do and be,
how the hell I got involved in this wild ride, etc....but today I've got a
serious topic. Kindness. I started thinking about this the other day
in my 6th grade gifted English class. We
are currently reading a novel, The View from Saturday, by e.l. konigsburg,
about four unlikely friends who bond over their participation in an academic
bowl and the teacher who chose them. It
is a uniquely written novel from varying points of view. The kids are different; they're quirky, and
definitely unique compared to their peers at school. Every year I read this novel my kids moan and
groan. In today's world of nonstop action,
this novel of friendship gets the thumbs down.
But it's message is powerful.
So I decided to have students blog about the chapters
thinking maybe that would help them enjoy the book more this year. I pose a question and my students respond to
my question and their peer's comments.
It's working wonderfully well.
The students are extremely engaged.
And as I was reading a post by one of my kind-hearted, ever helpful,
people-pleasing students it stopped me dead in my tracks. We talk, as a class, before each posting
about THINKing
before "speaking". I found
this poster on Google images and so we talk about the posts being helpful,
inspiring, and most importantly kind.
You see, the teacher in this novel is a paraplegic and at one point in
the story the bully asks her to write higher on the board because he is in the
back of the room he can't see what she wrote.
And later he writes the word cripple on the board. Of course the teacher reacts appropriately,
even injecting a little humor. I had a
question in my blog post about the teacher and what kids' impressions were of
her. That kind-hearted boy wrote,
"She's a really good teacher for a paraplegic." I honestly don't think what he wrote came out
as he wanted and it didn't register as poor taste with him either. Some kids picked up on it, but nobody was
appalled. Why?
Hmmm, what's a teacher leader to do in this situation? Of course, in my usual fashion I addressed it
with humor and said to the boy, "Boy, you're pretty smart for an
Indian." I got a bunch of Ohhhh's
and Wow's, but the point was made. Think
before you speak. We talked about how
powerful words can be as a class.
I've got a boy in class this year who is difficult. He believes he is academically far above the
rest of his peers (and me) and he makes sure everyone (including me) knows
it. Middle school aged kids + pompous
attitude = recipe for disaster. Needless
to say, he doesn't work well with others.
One day this boy, during silent reading time, was walking back and forth
in front of the classroom reading his book.
I am pretty lenient on where kids sit and read, but most just stick to
their desks. So this brazen display of,
"I'm reading" was only there to make sure he is seen. Everyone noticed, but said nothing...except
this one boy. He walked back to the
classroom library and bent down and whispered to one of his friends about
"Ben". After a few moments, I
went up to the boy and said, "I saw you whispering to your friend about
"Ben". Everyone is
different. You need to be kind...you
don't have to be friends with him, you just need to be kind." Blushing, the boy agreed.
I couldn't agree more! I have read the book, Wonder to my class and the message for that book is kindness. One of the main quotes from this book is "If you have the choice between being right and being kind, choose kind." My students LOVED this book and I really felt a shift in attitude with them after they had read the book. I also read "The View from Saturday" with my students and it did not get the reaction I was looking for either. I don't know if the message isn't clear but they did not attach to the characters like they did with "Wonder." I also think as teacher leaders, we need to be reinforcing kindness through our behavior and reactions. Sometimes students can be frustrating and can drive us crazy. I like how you dealt with the other student in the classroom. Students are watching us and observing our behavior and we need to be modeling kindness every day.
ReplyDeleteThanks for making the connection to Teaching Tolerance and the Kind Campaign - these are great resources for teachers as we reflect on how to interact with our students (and colleagues) in today's world. And, as you noted, much of that interaction is through modeling - our actions not necessarily our words.
ReplyDeleteI think all teachers have experienced a student that thinks they are above the law or smarter than everyone in the class. But even with that said, everyone deserves to be shown kindness. I like what you also said about bullying being such a buzz word today. I think that showing true kindness and acceptance to all students really shows them that they are appreciated. I try and teach my students that it's so much easier and pleasant to be happy and supportive than it is to be judgmental towards other people.
ReplyDeleteAwesome connecting Teaching Tolerance and your classroom. I have seen that some teachers struggle and choose to ignore these topics. I recently had a PD were we talked about tolerance and the effect on student learning. The problem that we focused on was not among students but among teachers and how they teach. It was amazing how much data was collected about how students that do not feel like they are acknowledged do not learn. I have experienced were teachers haven't been kind or acknowledge groups of students. It is a struggle to address this among adults when you challenge personal beliefs. I think it takes a strong Teacher Leader to be able to address this, it can be a sensitive subject for some teachers and students.
ReplyDelete